What if we told you, you could have perfectly cooked, fresh seafood that is enough to feed a small family for under 1,000 baht? Yes, in Pattaya.

Well, you can. Sitting on the beautiful Pattaya oceanfront, the Lanpho Naklua fish market is marked as a red pin on the maps app of most local Thais. But foreign visitors rarely know about its existence. We urge you to favourite it or circle it in your paper map that is tearing along the creases from all the unfolding it has gone through. And if you have a better half to share a meal with or you want to upgrade your dinner options, have a look at the most romantic restaurants in Pattaya.

Whether you’re into squid, clams, lobster, shrimp, or the alien of the culinary world, horseshoe crab, the fresh market (with heavy stress on the word fresh) is a truly memorable experience — the smell of the ocean, live seafood, no bells and whistles. All vendors will cook your food for a small fee. But if the line is too long, you can find more stalls further down the market that take care of steaming, grilling, and even frying your sea animals.

Join the ฿1,000 challenge with us (feel free to hashtag that) where we get as much seafood as humanly possible, have it cooked, and ready to eat with condiments. That’s around $30 if the currency is foreign to you.

Starting from Red Planet Pattaya, we take a 12-minute ride on the baht bus (songthaew) for ฿30. The market is divided into two zones: one for fresh seafood, the other for, well, not fresh seafood. We have nothing against the distinctive smell of dried seafood, but not today.

It becomes challenging to decide what to buy when the output of the ocean is laid down on ice in front of us. Giant mud crabs with claws bigger than its body, river prawns the size of a small lobster, and more than 20 different types of squid (we counted them). And all of this would equal to nothing without the spicy gift from the heavens (or the oceans). The seafood dipping sauce. We eat this hot, fragrant green deliciousness with everything — crispy pork, fried chicken, plain rice — because it just makes everything taste better.

And where do you eat it? From your lap on the legendary, colourful four-legged plastic stools found in any noodle stalls across the country. By the beach with the seagulls. Or in the car on your way to the next destination. That’s the best part about Naklua fish market — you decide.

• The bill
• 1 kilogram grilled river prawn ฿250
• 1 kilogram steamed crab ฿320
• 1 deep-fried snapper ฿160
• 1 plate fried rice with chunks of crab ฿100
• Lots of seafood dipping sauce ฿50
• Cooking fee ฿90
• Total ฿970

That’s ฿30 baht under, just enough to rent a beach mat to have a proper feast by the sea.